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Three Reasons Not to Use the Sassafras Science Books

May 12, 2014 2 min read

sassafras science

I have been following this blog since the beginning.

I follow everything that involves my nemesis, Cecil Sassafras.

I fear that you are getting the wrong impression. And, I cannot let you be deceived by that silly, eccentric man.

You see, he started out wanting to inspire his niece and nephew to love science. Unfortunately, despite my efforts to date, it seems to be working. While this is a good thing, the unfortunate side effect is that it has swelled Cecil's head.

Now, he thinks that by sharing their story he can inspire the world to love this subject.

I respect science after all most of my life's work draws upon its principles. I want students around the world to appreciate all that this subject entails.

But at the end of the day, I cannot let Cecil’s plans succeed. Especially not after what happened all those years ago. I refuse to allow that buffoon transform the world with his crazy ideas of science and fun.

It is for this very reason that I have taken over this website today.

I must share with you why you should NEVER allow your students to pick up one of these Sassafras Science books.

Three Reasons Not to Use the Sassafras Science Books

1. It will ignite the dreams of Cecil Sassafras.

Your students will love it. They will get wrapped up in the storyline and completely forget that they are learning science. Because of this, they will want to read more and more, which will only fuel the dreams of Cecil Sassafras. I cannot let him succeed. So I caution you – DO NOT let your students start one of the Sassafras Science books or you may never get them to put it down.

2. It will excite the dreams Cecil Sassafras.

Your students will have fun while learning about science. Not only will they enjoy reading about the adventure, but they will love the activities that go along with the story. They will relish putting together and reviewing their own SCIDAT logbook. The enthusiasm that they will display for learning science will only excite Cecil Sassafras, which one should never, ever do. You cannot encourage this man in his quest!

3. It will legitimize the dreams of Cecil Sassafras.

Your students will learn as much about science as they would from any standard textbook, maybe even more. They will be able to recall the details they read with chilling accuracy. This will only legitimize the ideas and claims of Cecil Sassafras, which will boost his confidence. I cannot have this happen!

A Final Word

I trust that you can see the importance of keeping your students away from this series. I realize that you want your students to love science, but you can easily do this without furthering the dreams of Cecil Sassafras.

I hope that I will never have to find a way to remove one of the Sassafras Science books from your home. Because make no mistake, I will win. I will defeat Cecil Sassafras.

Trust me, you want to be on the right side at the end of that...


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